Saturday, August 29, 2009

Hidden Mickeys and Jane Austen

After cheating death aka not dying on the bathroom floor at the luxurious del sol motel...I realized it was fate that brought my to Disneyland with my fellow EFY counselors.

But truth is, after about 2 hours of 'staying with the group' Mckay and I (co's week 9) decided to venture off on our own. shortly there after we were joined by Breanna (co's week 8) and Jared (co's week 10). In our little group of glee we began to experience Disneyland the way it was meant to be experienced...without 61 other EFY counselors singing disney songs in an hour long line.
But then something else struck a nerve!!!
What do you get when you cross 65 EFY counselors and Disneyland? Hidden mickeys!! If you don't believe me there's a mathematical proof I can show you to prove it...here it is...






Can't see it? That's because it's HIDDEN! like all the mickeys in Disneyland-after all it is a magical place. but if you still don't beleive me...with the help of Jane Austen I would like to explain to you legend of 'hidden mickeys'

"IT is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single efy counselor in possession of ample time must be in want of excitement.

However little known the truth or actuality of such a destination on first entering a fantasyland, this desire is so well fixed in the minds of the counselors, that Disneyland is considered as the rightful property of some one or other of their imaginations.

``My dear co-counselor,'' said his COW(crush of the week) to him one day, ``have you heard that on every ride at Disneyland, there are Hidden Mickey shapes?''

The Co-counselor replied that he had not.

``But it is true,'' returned she; ``for Eric D Stokes has just been here, and he told me all about it.''

The Co-counselor made no answer. (as she had been his COW three weeks prior and had now moved onto greener pastures)

``Do not you want to know where they are?'' cried the girl impatiently.

``You want to tell me, and I have no objection to hearing it.''

This was invitation enough. (But he 'should have said no' -regrets to Taylo Swift)

-Jane Austen (opening of Pride and Prejudice. 'bold' additions/improvements made by maggie ward)


*YES! there is a Hidden Mickey in Pirates-as you pass the stone wall where the pirates are shooting cannons, there is a hole in the wall in the shape of a mickey head.

*YES! there is also a Hidden Mickey in Pirates-when you pass the room with all the 'booty', a gold chest plate has a tiny mickey head in the center.

*YES! many of the other ones I heard that week were made up!

But it you can't beat them...join them. and this is exactly what the four of us did!

1) Did you know the Yetti from the Matterhorn yells 'Mickey is Tasty' in Finnish? (yes, I DID get a picture of this creature after my 5th ride).


2) Did you know that hidden mickeys are like cupids? and their very presence can evoke lustful emotions even on rides like 'Tower of Terror?' It's so powerful it even overcame Jared and Breanna who were supposed to be on 'passion patrol'


3) I bet you never would have caught this one! We can all thank Mckay for this gem. I almost passed this up.


4) You might be wondering...'why is this guy riding by himself?' He's not...Mickey is sitting next to him. Mckay and I are honoring his arrival as you can tell.


5) On Thursday Mckay and I took off for the beach. He fell asleep in this cumbersome bodily orientation (i tried to make my description of his position as awkward as the moment when I took this picture...did it work?) But he didn't roll over into this position on accident...oh no! He's just spooning with a hidden mickey.


6) At the conclusion of every evening... we wound down at Denny's. It appears nothing is out of mickey's sphere of influence.


7) This was a rather frightening one. While riding Big Thunder Mountain RailRoad...Mckay and I noted something odd about all the bird in the park. Did you know that Walt Disney was so OCD that he genetically engineered every bird to crap mickeys?! True story, ask Mckay it almost landed on his head.


8) I found this one! Took a keen eye to catch this beauty!


9) Jared noted that on California Soarin' the Fighter Jet's at the end....their exhaust? oh yeah...it spells Mickey...in BRAIL!


10) Finally, on Space mountain the speakers are hidden mickeys! not because of their shape. oh no! because if you play the song backwards whilst wearing peter pan tights and an Indiana Jones hat...it says 'mickey, mickey, mickey'!" Thank you again Jared Anderson


What did we learn from this trip to Disneyland?
...

..

.
absolutely nothing...except that I wish Mickey had been one of my co counselors

Saturday, August 22, 2009

On Monday I officially reached Celebrity Status

This last week a bunch of EFY counselors (roughly 65) took our annual trip to Disneyland to celebrate 12 successful weeks of youth camp. I use the term 'successful' because after 12 straight weeks of poorly fitting polos, uncrustable lunches, classes in tents, passion patrol, lock down, and swine flu...Nobody Died!! SUCCESS!

My first night at the luxurious Del Sol Motel, strategically placed across the street from Disneyland proved to be the greatest trial of our 'success', if you will, in that it almost tainted our 12 week 'no one died' streak. Around 3 am I woke up in my make shift bed (2 comforters and 2 pillows which Breanna and I shared on the floor) feeling nine shades of nasty. I was breathing like a pregnant woman during Lamaze class-trying not to throw up on the motel floor (though I'm sure worse things have happened). Ten minutes later I found myself laying on the bathroom floor. Thinking I had food poisoning I realized I had eaten In-n-Out earlier that evening. In-n-Out and I have a certain 'love affair' if you will. Relationships are all about give and take. I give In-n-Out my money...and In-n-Out gives me 1,000 extra calories. At the point of nausea I being thinking that my relationship with this fast food phenomenon is a rather unhealthy one. I give In-n-Out my love and it takes me life! I never thought anyone could die from unrequited love.

I realize an hour later that I'm dizzy and slipping in and out of consciousness. In the morning my roommates will find my lifeless body sprawled over our luxurious 4'x5' bathroom. As I prepare for my fate I begin thinking, "This is not how I planned to die." THEN IT HITS ME!!
WHAT MORE COULD I WANT OUT OF MY DEATH?

Recap:
1) I'm in a motel near the Greater LA area
2) I'm lying on the bathroom floor
3) I have overdosed on In-n-Out

My death will have all the ingredients to reach rockstar-status! People will line up outside the Del Sol Inn in a candle-light vigil, this little no-name motel will now be on Hollywood maps, My face will be in the newspaper, E! will set aside an entire Saturday just to replay the E! True Hollywood Story of Maggie Ward, and people will say, "She was a a good person...had a slight addiction to In-n-Out...but who doesn't these days?"

I WAS MEANT TO DIE LIKE THIS! if you don't believe me just look at the comparison to one of my high school plays...Foreshadowing? Talk about total cosmic convergance


At this point I begin working myself into the pose of all poses. Knowing a picture of my dead body will be plastered all over People Magazine I elevate one leg onto the bath tub, turn my hips 60 degrees, lift one arm above my head resting it on the tile floor under the toilet, and arch my head back in a truly dramatic stance. I begin to wonder if what I'm wearing will go well with yellow CAUTION tape...but realize it's too late now for wardrobe changes...and maybe my picture will be in black and white anyway...like one of those old 1950's crime scene pictures. I begin to slip and I think, "This is it!"


....four hours later Breanna knocks on the bathroom door waking me up, and says, "Maggie? What are you doing?"....


Whatever! Atleast next time I can plan for the Ritz-Carlton

Saturday, August 15, 2009

One time I wound up in Central Park

Approximately five weeks ago I left Phoenix for the Mormon Mecca of Provo. My trip was to last three weeks, however five weeks later I still had not returned....I was in New York City. To skip all the tourist stories I'll cut right to the chase and explain some of my favorite parts of my trip.



On Monday I had a few hours before I needed to meet Eric from Deloitte. Since I was to meet him downtown, I decided to take a stroll down Wall St. I ran into a public bathroom and changed into a black pencil skirt and a silk blouse. While walking out, a man told me, "Wow, you look beautiful!" I thought about this for a moment...A man on Wall St. told me I was beautiful! Would now be an appropriate time to mention that I think he was a bum? Most people might think this story has now lost all its value-On the contrary my friends-and this is why. I beleive this man was pan-handling, aka working (depending upon which political part you are a member of). Through transitive properties I can now claim, 'A man who works on Wall St. told me I was beautiful...TRUE STORY!!'


After passing the aforementioned man on the street, and now with a new found confidence in my stride I arrived to this lovely history gem. At first glance it just looks like the Statue of George Washington in front of the Federal Hall...


However, upon further inspection I saw these little gremlins. I first saw them while passing a glass department store window. Here the little sprites have appeared again. I wanted to pass them off as another weird thing to see in NYC...but then I thought of a family vacation I once took as a child to Hearst Castle. For those of you unfamiliar with Hearst Castle, it is the estate of the famous William Randolph Hearst, American Newspaper Magnate of the early 20th century. Back in his day he was known to have exotic animals roaming his 40,000 acre palatial ranch. So I thought...Hearst lived in New York for a good portion of his life...he was wealthy and successful. I came to this conclusion- These little creatures are the modern zoo animals to the gates of Wall street-a true necessity for every present-day Pulitzer.


It wouldn't be a true experience for me if I didn't embarrass myself atleast once. I had no worries of faring the treacheries of the subway and downtown Manhattan in stilletos. As my friends Calli and Traci would say, "We no longer fear hell...we've worked RETAIL!" What I didn't consider was all the little grates and holes on the street...and the number it would do on my BCBG's. By the time I arrived at Vesey St I had already lost the stud on the bottom of my left heel, revealing the tiny metal gold screw. The great thing is i now made clicking noises when I walked across the tile flooring. I'd love to say that was the end of it but OF COURSE it wasn't! I met up with Eric (who, keep in mind i'd never met before) and while hopping on the escalator, my heel got caught in the grating and my shoe came off. Only problem is once i lost my shoe, the escalator kept taking me up and I couldn't go back and get my shoe! Luckily a lady behind me grabbed it and gave it ot me. Talk about wicked first impressions! Truly one of those moments when I thought, "Oh my gosh, I'm an absolutely fool....but I can't WAIT to tell everyone about this later!"

In closing, it was a lovely trip. I met a lot of new people and had a better feel for the city as well as accounting firms. This trip gets an A+