Wednesday, September 29, 2010

does BYU have a crew team?

So this fall I made BYUSingers, and I'm SUPER JAZZED! However, I recognize I have a lot to work on so I have recently taken up voice lessons with my old voice teacher from a few years ago. She has recently moved so she gave me her new address. When I went to googlemaps to get directions to her house, I put the starting location as BYU. Well Googlemaps decided that meant BYU Hawaii, not Provo...and NO lie this is what it returned to me for directions!

In case you didn't quite catch it is again...up close

Thank you googlemaps for making my day! Maybe when I'm filthy rich and successful with a consulting job I can take whatever conundrum i'm faced with and approach it the same way as the googlemaps employee who solved this brain buster....with dry sarcasm and a tinge of incredulity regarding the question asked.

If a client asks me how to turn their company around so its profitable again I can say something like "Well, you can start by giving your self a raise and a big bowl of candy!....Actually though, you should probably just fire yourself" and when they look at me in a puzzled fashion I can say, "Seriously? you don't see the main problem?...time to resign brother"

Thanks Googlemaps employee for your refreshing bout of sarcasm.
Conclusion: don't try to figuratively cross the Pacific in an automobile...even technology will laugh at you.

Sunday, August 15, 2010

People People

Why are some people just SO entertaining? I could sit here and talk about all the funny things I've seen happen in New York City this summer....but I digress and pass it off to this video to do the job for me :)

More than that.......who autotunes these videos? I want to meet them :)

Wednesday, May 19, 2010


These are some of the things I was wondering today

1. Do you burn more calories walking in heels than in flats?
2. Does driving stick burn more calories?
3. Does thinking burn more calories? because I feel cheated if it doesn't
4. When will they invent calorie free pizza?

--> thank you

Tuesday, April 13, 2010

Liabilities + Equity = Lamour!

This semester has been the busiest semester of all my college years. Not because it was particularly packed...but because my goals for the semester increased. This semester I spent probably half of my weekend nights in the MAcc lounge on the third floor of the tanner building studying accounting concepts. However, I realized one small hitch in my plan this last month, that finally came to fruition today. Allow me to explain...

After choir on Fridays, the back row alto I section (Holli, Lindy, and Lauren) and I would go to the BYU bookstore and get fudge. I realized a few Fridays ago that something in me changed when upon taking my first bite of fudge (that week) I exclaimed, "And then I realized, with enough money and fudge I'll never need a man!"

I felt so enormously independent. It was a fabulous feeling! Instead of feeling excited to see a new love interest, I couldn't wait to see New York again. Instead of basking in the adoration of a boyfriend, I was glorying in the new earned respect I'd received from my male co-eds of the business school, and despite being undeniably single...I quite frankly had grown so accustom to spending time with my text books...that my initial contentedness in my own solitude blossomed into a deeper love for how little my text books ever talked back to me/was late for dates/started fights/WHAT HAVE YOU!

...I also found that I LOVED Star Wars and playing World of Warcraft...JUST KIDDING, I already knew I loved Star Wars...

I felt like Renee Zellweger in "Down with Love" when she publishes a book telling women to be 'Down with Love', to take control of their lives, and most of all...replace the need for a man with eating chocolate. Hmmm...I had done just this and this was a done deal!
Reveling in my new found independence, I felt unstoppable...until the unthinkable happened! I realized I was in love...

.....With ACCOUNTING!!

Upon leaving class today (the last day of classes before finals) I had this weird sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach. I thought, "Oh no mags, you don't need to feel like that THIS time...While you may have had a breakup the LAST THREE sets of winter semester finals...You don't have a boyfriend, so you couldn't possibly...." But I was! I was going through a break up!

In the last two weeks, as school has been wrapping up, I have found myself doing uncustomary things. I watched, "An Affair to remember", "Casablanca", "Pride & Prejudice" (1940's version), "How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days", and I was thoroughly disappointed when I couldn't locate "Sleepless in Seattle" the other day. I think my consumption of ice cream increased, and if there was a can of whip cream in my fridge I probably would have gladly squirted it all into my mouth and set it down next to the Kleenex box as I lay there on the couch. Most telling of all is probably this...I wore SCRUBS yesterday! Ok I wore a hoody to bed...but for those 2 hours before I fell asleep I felt as if I'd truly let myself go.

...Maybe if I date enough this summer I can convince myself I don't need accounting?

Saturday, March 20, 2010

Expansion-"Strategery" for every Successful Company

A new blog post will be up shortly...until then, feel free to check out my other blog...

"Can We Talk About"

Thursday, March 11, 2010

This week I won and Oscar

In honor of the Oscars...which I didn't watch by the way...I thought I would inform all of you that I won an Oscar this last week for this short film I did for one of my accounting class. We had problems the last 24 hours with youtube taking it down for my 'copyrighted soundtrack'....oops! but I changed some songs and hopefully this one stays the process it keeps putting the sound from the last scene out of sync...but after hours of editing I decided to let it go.

In our movie we discuss the benefits of outsourcing the internal audit function

(don't the 9:52 there is only about 30 seconds of educational material. the rest of it is chalk full of sheer cinematic excellence!)

This is probably the best movie I have ever made. My favorite part is when I beet up people in DI while wearing a wedding dress...or when Jon dresses up a dweeb...or maybe when Southcott tackles people in his Lacrosse gear.


(Be sure to rate it since we get a higher grade the more ratings we get!)

Thursday, March 4, 2010

My cardboard cut out is dating the cardboard cut out of Clark Gable in Hollywood Video...

Thanks to my confidence in giving dating advice, as expressed by previous posts, I have become somewhat of a 'dating guru', if you will. I don't know how to take first I was totally flattered and honored. But then I realized that recognition is only as valuable as the people giving it to you. While I do love all of you, my fellow blog followers, I am forced to ask the question, "Have you not realized that I am undeniably single?" This fact should discredit me from the start because this is, in essence, a situation commonly referred to as...

"The Blind leading the Blind"

But no worries my friends, I've decided that I should take my responsibility as 'love guru' about as seriously as you all take my blog posts dripping in sarcasm. That said I have no problem asserting my opinion as undeniable fact, and leading even more of you to years of loneliness.

Ok, So continuing on from my 2nd latest blog post, "Honey I'm on Holiday"....after improving your product offering, advertising becomes key. Apparently the rest of my fellow women's chorus council members thought this too when our conductor Sister Applonie said to me one day, "Now Maggie....we have a great idea for publicity...I personally love it...I think you will too...Well...actually....I don't might throw punches....but...We need...a Life-sized....cardboard cutout.... of the bookstore!"

Turns out they wanted to advertise our upcoming concert March 13th...not my dating life...but I knew both would happen and I love efficiency.

Here are some of Natalie and my favorite pictures we took that night.

We Finally settled on this one. . .(The black spot is where the poster is) We decided, demographically speaking, that 5'9'' was a better height for me so this is actually 2 inches shorter than me.

I have to admit, even though all of BYU now gets to check me out in my oh-so-stylish women's chorus uniform...I have developed a new favorite past-time called, "Let's walk through the bookstore and see how many weird looks I can get". It pretty much consists of me standing in an isle next to my cardboard cut out, smiling at people, and seeing how many people almost say hi to me or get really embarrassed like they should know me...but can't remember where we met...then realize they just saw 'me' four seconds and 15 feet ago.

In closing, our Women's Chorus concert is going to FABULOUS! and everyone should come...because it will change your life. one time while passing out fliers I saw a guy with a broken leg and Lauren said to me, "I'm gonna go up to that guy, hand him a flier and say, "This concert will HEAL YOUR LEG!"

While my cardboard cut out may not help me get a date (But then again, BYU guys are into girls in velvety sparkly tops these days)...I figured I owed it to those of you who actually listen to me to provide you with a fabulous date night. I know, I'm so selfless :)

If your single...bring a date, and the girl will look at you at the end of the night and say, 'Ooo You're so classy taking me to a Women's Chorus concert!" and if she doesn't? Problem solved! you just witnessed 180 girls...serenading...YOU!

If you're married...why not surprise your wife with, "Two tickets to that thing she loves!" (Though I can't promise the tickets will turn into diamonds)

-See you there my friends!

Buy tickets:

BYU Women's Chorus from BYUarts on Vimeo.

Sunday, February 14, 2010

Who needs Cupid when Narcissus can be your Valentine?

This was the best valentine's day EVER because I got these roses...


No, that's not right. I got those LAST valentines day...

What did I do THIS valentine's day?

Oh yeah I remember now!


I went and had a romantic evening at this gazebo over looking Provo with my boyfriend!

CRAP! that was TWO years ago...

For the life of me I can't remember why this was such an awesome valentine's day...

Oh yeah I remember....

Allow me to walk you through my valentine's week proceedings...

My mom sends me cards for every holiday. She's usually pretty good about being on time. In fact, I don't think she's ever been late by more than a day! Which is pretty good considering it's my 4th year in college.

My mom is valentine's day card showed up in JANUARY!

I LOVE HER! I'm so glad this came early because I got to spend the previous 16 days in the company of this good man!

FALSE! included in my card was a gift card to Olive Garden with the condition: "Just don't take the guy on the front of this card"

So Lauren Johns and I had a lovely romantic dinner at Olive Garden this weekend...and by romantic I mean we sat at the bar because for being - as Joel McHale calls it - The worst thing to happen to Italian Americans since the Mafia and 'Jersey Shore', Olive Garden is PACKED on weekends!

We discussed our top reasons why it's awesome to be single on valentine's day...

(1) I get to the ENTIRE box of See's Candy my grandpa sent me. . .and this is the gift that keeps giving because now that i've successfully ingested 5,000 calories. . .odd are I'll be single this time next year.

(2) Instead of wondering for the 2 weeks leading up to Valentine's day, "Are we dating? Do i need to get him something for V-day?" I curled up with the thought of the man on my card...Mmmmm....STEAMY!!

(3) Since V-Day was on a Sunday this year...many people in Provo celebrated on Saturday...
I, however, wore sweats ALL DAY!

(4) I don't have to look at my boyfriend's swollen eyes as he looks at me on the verge of tears as I explain to him that I forgot valentine's day!

(5) I realized this year that sometimes when I'm talking to someone and there's a mirror behind their head...I watch myself talk...Or if I'm walking down the Tanner Building stairs...I look at my reflection in the little mirrored panels...Or if i'm window shopping....I'm really not looking in the window...I'm staring at my reflection. Sound familiar?

check out the story of Narcissus in case you forgot the story from Greek mythology.

Sure Narcissus was cursed to fall in love with his own reflection in the river...YEAH, he died there too.


So quite frankly, I think hanging out with myself on Valentine's day is the Shizz.

Long story VH1 would say, "I'm having the BEST WEEK EVER" because I spent it with girlfriends, the dude on my card, and quite honestly....myself :)


Thursday, January 14, 2010

Honey I'm on Holiday

One time this summer I called my good friends Mike Folsom and Cameron Earl. Mike asked me, "Maggie you're back in Phx now right?" To which I responded..."Only for a week then i'm back at BYU for school."

The rest of the conversation went something like this...
Mike: "Maggie...why do you tease?"
Me: "Oh Mike I only aim to please!"
Mike: "First you're here, then in Utah, then you run off to New York! Why do you do this?"

(And this is when genius struck me)

Me: "To keep supply low and market price high for my dating stock dearest Folsom. I don't want to flood the if I just leave town here and there, snag the occasional boyfriend here and there, and remain relatively unavailable...then every time I come back to town it's like re-entering the market. Every welcome home should be like an IPO!"

I was joking when I said this...but then I started thinking...THIS IS TRUE!

First let's discuss the supply and demand it is.....
As you can see, the y axis is price and the x axis is the quantity. The supply curve explains that as price increases, suppliers are willing to supply a greater quantity...but the demand curve operates in the opposite, when the price decreases more people are willing to buy. An efficient market operates at the equilibrium point where suppliers and demanders agree upon price and quantity.

So how does this apply to dating? Well first of all we need to adjust the supply curve...because there is only one of you can really only provide one quantity...and to be honest the idea of supplying more of yourself with an increase in price is verging on prostitution (but maybe that's just my opinion...I am, in fact, watching Moulin Rouge at the moment).

So here we have the supply and demand curve of dating with a vertical supply curve...I have appropriately marked equilibrium as you can tell.Here equilibrium is relatively low...Think of price as the quality of men in your life. So at this point the men in your life are less than impressive.

That's ok! because thanks to modern economic theory...there IS such thing as a shift in the supply curve. Now there may be only one of you...but you can make yourself somewhat more 'elusive' as it were. This is what Mike was referring to when he asked me why i was always gone. By limiting supply you can sufficiently shift the supply curve to the left, raising the price at which equilibrium occurs!The next shift is slightly harder to achieve, however, and requires a little more time and investment. A shift in the demand curve, in economic theory, raises the price at which a consumer would be willing to pay for a commodity at any given quantity. this case...luck you! you can now expect equilibrium (or Lamour) to occur at a higher price (aka with better quality of men).
So how do you make this happen? Easy, improve the quality of your offering. . .education, life experience, musical talent, what have you....

The point is, you're in control of your dating equilibrium....Which is why I've currently decided to take time out of dating. . .decrease my face time (creating a supply shift) in the dating market...focus on school/my internship this summer in New York City (creating a shift in the demand curve)...and come back in August to a better dating market. . .aka better men.

Taking control of your love life is easy...which is why I'm encouraging every girl currently disappointed with her love life to say...

"Honey, I'm on Holiday!"