On Monday I officially reached Celebrity Status

This last week a bunch of EFY counselors (roughly 65) took our annual trip to Disneyland to celebrate 12 successful weeks of youth camp. I use the term 'successful' because after 12 straight weeks of poorly fitting polos, uncrustable lunches, classes in tents, passion patrol, lock down, and swine flu...Nobody Died!! SUCCESS!

My first night at the luxurious Del Sol Motel, strategically placed across the street from Disneyland proved to be the greatest trial of our 'success', if you will, in that it almost tainted our 12 week 'no one died' streak. Around 3 am I woke up in my make shift bed (2 comforters and 2 pillows which Breanna and I shared on the floor) feeling nine shades of nasty. I was breathing like a pregnant woman during Lamaze class-trying not to throw up on the motel floor (though I'm sure worse things have happened). Ten minutes later I found myself laying on the bathroom floor. Thinking I had food poisoning I realized I had eaten In-n-Out earlier that evening. In-n-Out and I have a certain 'love affair' if you will. Relationships are all about give and take. I give In-n-Out my money...and In-n-Out gives me 1,000 extra calories. At the point of nausea I being thinking that my relationship with this fast food phenomenon is a rather unhealthy one. I give In-n-Out my love and it takes me life! I never thought anyone could die from unrequited love.

I realize an hour later that I'm dizzy and slipping in and out of consciousness. In the morning my roommates will find my lifeless body sprawled over our luxurious 4'x5' bathroom. As I prepare for my fate I begin thinking, "This is not how I planned to die." THEN IT HITS ME!!
WHAT MORE COULD I WANT OUT OF MY DEATH?

Recap:
1) I'm in a motel near the Greater LA area
2) I'm lying on the bathroom floor
3) I have overdosed on In-n-Out

My death will have all the ingredients to reach rockstar-status! People will line up outside the Del Sol Inn in a candle-light vigil, this little no-name motel will now be on Hollywood maps, My face will be in the newspaper, E! will set aside an entire Saturday just to replay the E! True Hollywood Story of Maggie Ward, and people will say, "She was a a good person...had a slight addiction to In-n-Out...but who doesn't these days?"

I WAS MEANT TO DIE LIKE THIS! if you don't believe me just look at the comparison to one of my high school plays...Foreshadowing? Talk about total cosmic convergance


At this point I begin working myself into the pose of all poses. Knowing a picture of my dead body will be plastered all over People Magazine I elevate one leg onto the bath tub, turn my hips 60 degrees, lift one arm above my head resting it on the tile floor under the toilet, and arch my head back in a truly dramatic stance. I begin to wonder if what I'm wearing will go well with yellow CAUTION tape...but realize it's too late now for wardrobe changes...and maybe my picture will be in black and white anyway...like one of those old 1950's crime scene pictures. I begin to slip and I think, "This is it!"


....four hours later Breanna knocks on the bathroom door waking me up, and says, "Maggie? What are you doing?"....


Whatever! Atleast next time I can plan for the Ritz-Carlton